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It’s Time To Talk About Trae Young’s Hair

BadGalAli 1

As a blogger it’s always my job to bring attention to the most important issues in sports and entertainment, so no need to praise me for being brave enough to approach a topic some people are scared to discuss.

The silence on this issue is deafening. What is going on atop Trae Young’s head is a national nightmare that we need to start a conversation about. If no one else wants to do it, I will. In his two years in the NBA I haven’t seen nearly as many people mention it as I’d imagine. I had to Google if he had some unfortunate follicle disease that everyone was aware of and agreed not to make fun of it before I said anything so I wouldn’t be canceled. Happy to learn I wasn’t alone.

Nothing turned up. Trae Young just has really awful hair, and I’m sick of being quiet about it.

Screen Shot 2020-03-01 at 10.24.34 PM

I mean, what the fuck is that? I’m all about being yourself and owning who you are but if I can muster up the time and energy every day to put on a layer of mascara, Trae Young can buy a hairbrush. This isn’t a statement about self love and acceptance, it’s just gross. If he played for the Lakers I’d assume Lebron paid him to draw attention away from his own hair issues. There can’t be any other reason to go on national TV like that.

Trae Young is 21 and a 1st round NBA player living in Atlanta and I bet he gets no pussy. No self respecting gold digger could even stand to look back at that while faking an orgasm to get money for lip injections. It’s not worth it.

It’s not even trolling it’s just really fucking true. His hair does look like that! I want to start this conversation to help Trae Young. I guess having just reached legal drinking age we can’t expect Trae to be ready to accept that he needs to be a bald/buzzcut guy so early in his NBA career but come on. The people in Trae’s life that really care about him need to have a cutoff date where they step in and for a hair intervention. Lebron is going to have to invite him on the next season of The Shop and do it there. Someone should have done the same for Britney years ago. Katy Perry is days away from hers, I can feel it. I’ve given up hope on Kuzma, but at least he switches it up. Caruso it adds to his allure. There is no logical or illogical explanation for Trae Young’s hairstyle.

MY HAIR IS DIFFERENT THAN A LOT OF PEOPLE’S. I LIKE MY HAIR. I LIKE THE FADE. I LIKE THE LITTLE DESIGN I HAVE. I’M COOL WITH IT. OBVIOUSLY MY HAIR IS THIN ON TOP, SO IT LOOKS LIKE A BALD SPOT, BUT I REALLY COULD CARE LESS. IF THAT’S WHAT MAKES THEM SLEEP GOOD AT NIGHT … I’M COOL. I’M SLEEPING GOOD.”

Different doesn’t always mean good, people. Clearly Trae Young is sleeping very soundly with this newborn baby waking up from a nap hair with that extra 45 seconds he is saving from never brushing it.

This is for you Trae, I really think it would help grow your fanbase. It’s literally making people feel uncomfortable. People can’t respect an NBA All Star that looks like an armpit.

aliweitz

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Captain NBA
Captain NBA
March 2, 2020 10:35 am

Hair looks like doo doo paper

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