Everyone’s favorite weekly unsolicited Q&A is back!
I’m not going to waste anytime with
fluff foreplay, lets jump right into some questions!
This is basically a free ad for this guy to try and smash some Reddit puss. This was posted 18 hours ago and has zero comments while simultaneously trending on r/sex. That means everybody saw this personal ad and said “yeah no I’m good”. You have to delete your account if this goes 24 hours with zero comments, there’s no coming back from that.
I haven’t kink shamed since 2017 and posts like these have me inches away from relapsing. If this person has some kind of money (he probably doesn’t) I’d say throw a dart at the Instagram thotboard and he may find someone to do this for him like it’s a regular 9-5. Could you imagine the girl who gets that job. Putting on the hard hat, punching in her time card and just walking around the mall giving this guy wedgies and bullying him. That sounds like a honest day’s work to me.
Don’t worry bro Derek and his buddies will pick up your slack.
Boom another cuck/simp joke! I’ll stop using them when they stop being funny!
I scrolled this user’s history and I can confirm that they’re not the sexiest Reddit couple (the dirty feet on one of their posts downgraded their username to just “RedditCouple” for me). Also the intentional or unintentional grammatical errors in their post coupled with the inflated ego makes me hope that they never fulfill this fantasy.
If given the option to jerk off before meeting up with someone where sex has a 60-99.9% chance of happening ALWAYS JERK OFF BEFORE HAND. Especially since you haven’t seen her for awhile. Lasting longer for your woman after not seeing each other for 3 months (90 days) is a gift that flowers, chocolates, or jewelry can’t compete with.
*Presses X to doubt the entire post* We got our first 1000% confirmed fake post in this blog’s history. Fuck this guy and his fake 1000/100 sex rating he gave himself.
MC Jam Zam sounds like the nerdiest rapper name in the history of rapper names. He should change his rap name to MC I have every STD under the sun because I hate condoms, that’s a guy that’ll get downloads from me on my Apple Music. Don’t let that previous wordplay joke fool you, I do get paid to tell jokes.
I am betting my entire PS2 game collection (Tony Hawk’s Underground 2 included) that this guy is lying about being 21, but isn’t lying about being a senior. The teacher’s age of 30 is not up for debate and I won’t pretend to be shocked when this teacher is being escorted out of her zoom class in handcuffs. ABC,NBC,CNN,FOX everyone who’s anyone in the news game be sure to credit Branded Sports for predicting this.
Alright this seems like a good place to wrap up this blog! Until then, stay safe and stay horny people of Reddit.
Header image via Alarmy (LINK)