Big Corn Is Up To Something

Everywhere I turn these days there’s only one thing: corn. I wake up, take a big toke out of my corn cob pipe, grab a buttery slice of cornbread, fire up Tik Tok, and there’s nothing but folk remixes of a video of a kid very normally talking about how good corn is.

As far as I was aware we were all on the same page about how good corn is before this week. Does it sometimes have a negative effect on the digestive system? Sure. But going in it’s absolutely delectable. Pound for pound, there may not a better food item than a fresh sweet corn on the cob with butter and salt on those little corn on the cob skewers in the middle of a Summer cookout.

So why are people all of a sudden pretending to be just now finding out how good corn is? Who wasn’t on the corn bandwagon before this week? Something must be going on in the corn industry that needed PR CPR for it to be as viral as it is right now.

@mariamsfunbunch

I’m back! And yes! I created this paint specifically for this song 😂 #itscorn #corn #cornsong #enjoy

♬ Corn but it becomes a song and unites world – schmoyoho

From what I was able to decipher from this headline, there is a corn shortage, which is indeed not very corntastic at all. The tortilla and chowder industries, as well as franchise owners of all Chili’s know how important this crop is to the fiber of this country. Big Corn had to fight back, they were backed into a corner.

When the smartest minds of our lifetime get together for their annual marketing brainstorm meeting, there is at least half a whiteboard full of ideas for viral corn ideas. Somewhere before lunch the ‘cute kid + talking about how much he loves ____’ pitch was made and the rest is history. I’ve seen how much Tik Tok influencers make for promoting products and trust me, the amount going into the Big Corn creator fund is enough to keep the industry afloat.

Vibes haven’t been this high on corn in 20 years and I can’t help but be a little suspicious of the timing.

aliweitz

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