Monkeys, Strippers, and Texas Football

Jake Myers

Disclaimer: Some videos included in this article are NSFW, and are not suitable for persons under the age of 18. 

Late Monday night one of the strangest College Football stories went viral. Texas special teams coach Jeff Banks’s pet monkey attacked and injured a trick or treater on Halloween night. The report specified that the monkey’s jaws had to be pried off of the child.

Jeff Banks hasn’t commented on these reports but his current girlfriend, Dani Thomas, has. She explained there was a  “Do Not Enter” sign (seen below) and the child went into an area that they weren’t supposed to.

Once Thomas started to get involved, her identity as the famous stripper “Pole Assassin” came to light.

To add another layer to this story, the monkey sometimes accompanies her on stage during her routine.

After defending her monkey’s honor, in addition to her personal past being spread like wildfire, Thomas deleted her Twitter.

This is one of the most random stories that I have ever followed in College Football, and it was a great way to end a Halloween weekend.

 

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