We Are Having A Shortage Of Sex Toys Because The Suez Canal Is Clogged

Here I was asking the Branded group chat if there was anything to blog. My pal KMess, who if you don’t know is a ripped, sent me a New York Post article titled “Ship carrying sex toys among hundreds of blocked vessels in Suez Canal”. What a headline.

If you didn’t know there is a massive ship blocking the Suez Canal in Egypt and it is halting everything from going through. Apparently, this canal is wildly popular for shipping goods and for the past week nothing has gone through which could affect the global economy. Now I don’t have a source for this and I’m just a random blogger but I saw on Twitter a few days ago this could raise gas prices and actually affect the American economy for the next three months. Seems like this canal is kind of important, who knew! $10 billion (with a b) are being lost commercially everyday because of this block.

About 9 hours ago the ship was mostly out of the banks and was looking good… two hours later and strong winds pushed it right back into the banks. You literally can’t make this shit up.

We aren’t here for this though. No we are here to talk about one ship that is currently being blocked because of this. The biggest online sex toy retailer is saying they are losing MILLIONS because they can’t pass this ship.

“There are more than 20 containers full of well-running items, such as vibrators, dildos and male masturbators,” CEO Evertine Magerman

RTV Noord

Can someone do a wellness check on the roster girls?? I can’t imagine they’re taking this news well. Honestly, this is probably why Echo is hitting on DoorDash drivers.

If they don’t do some in depth, big J journo reporting on this on the next episode someone will need to actually check on them. Make sure we aren’t dealing with any imposters.

Hopefully by the end of the week the sex toys will be delivered to horny men and women all across the world. All we can really do is pray at this point.

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NY Post article

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