Emotions erupted last week when the new graphic for Lola Bunny was released and that thang was no longer thangin.
Despite the fact that the image everyone was freaking out about was actually a pornographic illustration fan art of Lola Bunny, if you just crop her jersey and teach her a little Tyra Banks booty tooch, I think Ms. Bunny has still got it.
But it got me thinking, why are we only horny for the female cartoons? My ladies know that there is a short list of digital drawings of dudes that get that blood pressure rising.
Hands down the #1 unanimous decision for hottest cartoon character of all time, Aladdin is probably the only one who can pull off MC Hammer pants and still make me want to go on that magic carpet ride. While he might not have the upper body strength of some of the other princes, his longevity can’t be ignored.
Simba (Young Version)
Now this one might be a little controversial, but the original Simba has big dick energy. Maybe it was because he was voiced by JTT in his prime. Maybe it was the subliminal sex messaging that hypnotized me as a child.
Gerald from Hey Arnold
Gerald always intimidated me with just how naturally cool he was. I feel like he’d be huge on Tik Tok. Plus that high top? I bet Gerald got all the pussy when we got to college.
This is a man that doesn’t skip shoulder day. He will fight for my honor, but also capable of growth and learned respect for women. If you can teach a man gender equality, who knows what else he can become. Now that’s hot.
I cannot speak to the charm or character of this one as I’ve never seen an episode, but the cartoon designers really went off on this one. Jawline is something that can only be created on screen, nothing that perfect exists in real life.
Max is every gen Z girls dream. Got Daddy’s money and has major Cali teen skateboard bro vibes. Would definitely be part of Sway House.
You can’t make a hot cartoon list without including Gaston, but he is such as asshole fuckboy it pains me to do it. Depending on where I’m at I would let him ruin my life though.
Burn me a mix CD and leave me on read. Trent from Daria was the first to really make depression seem hot and mysterious. Ripped jeans, facial hair, tattoos and piercings, Trent was also in a band and would definitely have supported Black Lives Matter.
Sorry, Prince Eric is for basics.