(Video) Eagles Cheerleader Just Doomed Philadelphia To 0-16

Quick recap for everyone at home. Eagles played the Washington Football Players on Sunday and had their hearts ripped out of their chest. Everyone played awful and it was a big shit show. As usual, on the first Monday of the NFL season, we all overreact. We freak out and talk about cutting guys, firing management and trading players.

That’s what we do, it’s football fan 101. It’s like our form of therapy and Sunday we’ll be back in front of our tv cursing the day away. It’s not just one game, you lose week 1 and you’re basically eliminated from the playoffs. Well, at least until week 2.

Eagles cheerleader, Kyle Tanguay, who by the way turned us down to make a hilarious video during quarantine. Apparently Kyle isn’t use to the ebb and flows of living in Philadelphia. And he decided he wanted to try and bring us together or something like that, anyway, here’s the result.

Now, I don’t want to be over dramatic. But that was the worst and cringiest video I’ve ever seen in my entire life. And I saw the Ashley Simpson debacle happen live. Kyle, what are you doing?

First off, who is he talking to? Fans of other teams that are shitting on us or Eagles fans that are shitting on Eagles fans? Because what is the point of being a Philadelphia sports fan if I can’t hate my team. That’s like half the joy we get out of it. Ryan Howard was setting record after record in his prime. But you know what happened when he struck out? We boo’d that son of a bitch and called him a bum. It’s just what we do. We’ll always love the guy, just in those moments we think you’re the biggest loser we’ve ever seen.

And if this was to fans of other teams……not getting the job done. You don’t answer ‘oh you don’t like us’ with ‘well we love us!!’ That’s not how it works, that’s not how any of this works. I thought for a second there, right after he said ‘maybe you don’t like us’ that he was about to go right into the ‘no one likes us, no one likes us, no one likes us and we don’t care!’ That would have been an amazing plot twist.

If the music cut and he was like ‘we’re from Philly! Fucking Philly! No one likes us we don’t care!!’

End scene.

Kyle, you want to bring the people together. Take notes from this gentleman

Go Birds

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