The Ending Of This Week’s 90 Day Fiancé Is The Most Shocking Moment In TV History

BadGalAli

Spoilers ahead if you have not caught up on 90 Day Fiancé first of all what in the hell are you doing and second of all it’s worth the pay off of watching this episode live.

I’m fairly new to the 90 Day Fiancé movement. From what I’ve gathered in my intensive research there haven’t been a ton of Catfish scenarios in show history. Typically we’ve either got a desperate for green card situation a la Rose and Ed or an actual love story like Michael and Angela, obviously. Throw in a Darcey desperate for fame storyline and there have been so many uncertainties in 90 Day Fiancé history.

But nothing has been more certain this season than the fact that David, a 60 year old cat guy, obsessed with Russian accents, is being scammed and Catfished by his 27 year old Ukrainian girlfriend Lana. Only thing more certain is that Yolanda’s British boyfriend Williams is a Nigerian prince looking for someone to post ransom to free him from his impending beheading.

After hiring a Ukrainian private investigator and promptly firing him for even insinuating Lana was a scammer using him for the hundreds of thousands of dollars he had securely sent to her, David put on his finest clown makeup and most intimidating floor length pleather jacket to ‘meet’ Lana for the 5th time.

The viewers had seen this story before. 4 times to be exact. We watched David sit hopelessly for hours alone at a restaurant with a vase of roses just weeks ago on his “last” trip to meet Lana. We heard about her brother’s death that prevented their meeting the time before that. The random medical procedure that coincidentally got scheduled after David spent 24 hours traveling. We were all there during the cliffhanger of David risking his life to drive to a small war torn town and knocking on the door of a random address he remembered from 7 years of online conversations only to be validated when a husky Ukrainian man opened the door. Instead of murdering him and dismembering his body, the man pitied David, obviously involved in a very common Ukrainian scam technique. Svetlana, or Lana, is even the most basic and obvious Russian scammer name around.

So when David stood in the monument square with 3 minutes left in the episode, we all prepared for another cliffhanger. Lana had already postponed the meeting to attend her nephew’s hockey game.

What none of us were prepared for was this:

That’s right motherfuckers, LANA IS A REAL, LIFE, LIVING BREATHING WOMAN. Truly the most shocking, unexpected, unpredictable, most dramatic cliffhanger of all time.

Now Lana’s existence certainly doesn’t rule out her being a scammer. In fact, I’d argue this solidifies it.

Lana’s boss undoubtedly heard about the 90 Day production crew and negotiated a deal to get her to show up to this 5th scheduled meeting. Negotiations are probably what was being worked out when she said “nephew’s hockey game”. Lana the person might be real, but there’s no chance she was actually the one typing to David over 7 years. That was a small Indian man in a cubicle.

Ultimately this makes me feel for Lana. 99% of creepy American men on these sites probably sit glued to their computer with their credit card info in hand. No initiative to fly across the world to actually interact with a woman in real life. It may not be an honest living, but it’s certainly a respectable one from Lana and her business associates. Never did they expect to actually have to show up with the goods. For her sake, I hope Lana is wearing a wire.

aliweitz

 

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