Kendall Jenner With Throw Her Cooch Wherever She Damn Well Pleases


Of all the Kardashian/Jenner children, Kendall is by far the most mysterious. For a while I had a theory she was a lesbian and Kris Jenner was just setting up paparazzi photo shoots with random guys to hide the real truth. Now that I think about it I think that’s still the most likely scenario.

Last I knew, Kendall was back together with Ben Simmons. But I’ll be honest when I heard they were not quarantined together, deep down I knew something bad was going to happen.

Kendall’s dating history alone could build a solid NBA roster. She dated Jordan Clarkson, was rumored to be with Kyle Kuzma although that was never confirmed…then there was Blake Griffin. As of sometime in 2020, Kendall was last socially linked to Ben Simmons. Looking at that squad, Kendall clearly saw what the rest of us do, she needs a real shooter. Clarkson and Kuzma have their games, but neither is a true scorer. Blake Griffin lives in the paint. When you need a shot with the game on the line, you need a hot shooter who has the potential to change the game, and that’s where Devin Booker comes in (in this scenario Harry Styles would be the waterboy).

Fast forward to April (I think) and TMZ, and really everyone in the state of Arizona, reported seeing a Maybach at a rest stop with Devin Booker and Kendall Jenner prancing around outside.

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But the biggest problem occurred when Kris Jenner tried to control the narrative on this one. I’ve long proclaimed that Kris Jenner is the acting NBA commissioner. Whatever is better for the Kardashian/Jenners is what’s best for basketball. Take a look at this crafty “source”

“Kendall and friends have a small social circle amongst the group, who have been following the same social distancing and physical distancing guidelines. Devin is a friend and is part of the small group.”

Kendall Jenner is one of the biggest celebrity super models on the planet. You’re trying to tell me Devin Booker, of the Phoenix Suns is in her small social circle group quarantining together? She wouldn’t let her own boyfriend Ben Simmons to join this exclusive circle, but D Book made the team? Get out of here.

TMZ continued…

24-year-old Kendall and 23-year-old Devin have been friends for years. They’ve been running in the same social circles since at least 2018.

“At least 2018” means around last holiday season. It’s such a random measure of time it almost seems real. Just around the same time Devin’s $158 million contract kicked in.

From the top rope Kendall stepped in and dropped a nuke on Kris’ plan to keep things vague and somewhat believable.

For the record, Kendall has been dealing with this storyline for years. Lasted almost as long as Scott’s rehab storyline. You don’t just keep dating every NBA player if you can’t handle the heat. Kendall’s heard it from Kyle Kuzma’s Instagram ex, Katya Henry. She got called out by Ben Simmons’ sister, and I’m sure Tinashe has said much, much worse after a few glasses of wine on the phone with her friends.

The original tweet in question was fairly mild for Twitter, and honestly not terribly funny in the first place.

In peak 2020 fashion, this lady defended Kendall from the Internet haters.

Now I have never heard this expression before, but you can guarantee the first thing I’m going to do when this quarantine is over is throw my cooch all over the place. For any other girl with that history, the gold digger shaming would be warranted. But Kendall does not need these idiots. At 5’10, her options are pretty much limited to professional athletes anyways. Don’t get it twisted, Kendall is in full control of where she’s throwing that cooch, and it’s very clear right now it’s on Devin Booker.

I draw the line at Trae Young, Kendall.


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