Was Jim Schwartz A Bad Ass In High School?

Joe

We all know Jim has that death stare that says “don’t fuck with me unless you want to meet your maker.” But he also kinda gives off these vibes of a little nerd boy. I mean you remember when he got bodied by Harbaugh in a post game handshake?

 

That’s nerd boy 101. Bigger, cooler, better looking guy gives you a little shove and you lose your mind. Classic, ‘mom ain’t going tot tell me to clean my room anymore’ behavior here. So picture how shocked I has to read that in high school he was a rebel without a cause.

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Might as well just said ‘alright alright alright.’ Schwartz spent all of his time just clanging and banging to Judas Priest. If I had to wager a guess I’d say there are roughly 100 little illegitimate baby Schwartz running around out there. James John doesn’t have time to be your daddy, he’s got to work on maxing out his bench press.

If I’m Jeffery Lurie I read this and it’s time to renegotiate Jim’s contract. How’s a life time deal and whatever price you want sound Jimmy?

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