SOURCE – Some of the last people in the world to find out about the rapid spread of Covid-19 are a group of 14 men and women sitting in a house in Cologne, western Germany, where they are competing in the country’s 13th season of the reality TV show Big Brother.
The majority of the housemates have been in isolation since 6 February, when news of the novel coronavirus was only just trickling out of Wuhan in China. Since then, they have been cut off from updates from the outside world, except once, when the show introduced four more housemates on 6 March, three days before Germany would report its first death from the virus.
Ohhh, boy! You think they have English subtitles? Regardless it’s time to learn some German stat before 7pm German time (2pm on the East Coast). What do I have better to do? I’m in isolation. I’m sure I can find some bootleg Rosetta Stone to learn enough by this afternoon. All the German I know I learned from watching Beer Fest.
You think we’re in isolation now? Nothing is compared to the isolation Big Brother contestants go through. No news. No contact with the outside world. Just 14 people fighting for the Head Of Household with German Julie Chen barking at them.
Could you imagine going off the grid and a global pandemic happens? You’re sitting in the hot tub, chain smoking some darts, and enjoying a cold Beck’s while listening to some Hasselhoff. Life’s good. And then the news of a global pandemic that has no cure is dropped on you? Turns out Oma and grandpa might bite the dust, but you’re technically one of the safest people in the whole world right now in your accidental Bio-Dome.
Also, I didn’t know Big Brother was a multi-international juggernaut. Are there multi-international Survivors or Price Is Right’s? Just some host in Uzbekistan telling his fellow citizens to spay and neuter their pets. Or some germaphobe hosting Deal Or No Deal in Taiwan. Here’s a video from the Canadian Big Brother contestants when they realized there was no live audience at the second eviction.
Also, you need to fire the German producers of Big Brother immediately. How did they not think dropping the news of a global pandemic on the faces of a bunch of Krauts would make for good television? They only decided to tell them after they were bullied into it from the backlash received on social media. I’ll tell you something, that would never work on Jeff Probst’s Survivor. Jeff would slap the shit out of some producer if he found out they were going to hurt ratings in any way. You want to know why he’s built Survivor into a juggernaut going on 20 seasons? His ability to create drama out of thin air. He’ll rip people’s hearts out if they aren’t giving it 100% for the Immunity Idol. Nobody comes into Jeff Probst’s tropical carnival fun-land of obstacles and feats of strength to not give it their all. I’m pretty sure he cums his pants every time he gets to extinguish someone’s torch once they’re voted off the island.
Could you imagine if Chris Harrison had to deliver this news? He’d probably have some Bachelor producer do the job. He let a guy name Chad just emasculate him on Bachelor in Paradise? Just ran Chris Harrison’s name through the mud and diminished his brand forever talking about how he’s just a guy drinking mimosas in a robe. Chris Harrison definitely drinks mimosa’s in a robe and gets flown in to elimination ceremonies all the time. If Chad would’ve pulled this shit with Probst, we would’ve had a Natalie Holloway situation on the beaches of Aruba. They would have to identify Chad by his dental records. No one upstages Probst Malone on his show.