This Coronavirus Theory Makes Too Much Sense To Not Be True

So everything is basically shut down. Baseball, hockey, college basketball, even Tom Hanks. Corona is officially a real son of a bitch. Which has got me thinking, why, why would God do this to us? We’re about to go at least two weeks with ZERO sports. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy. Which made me realize, this isn’t God’s plan work, no this is the work of someone else. So I have developed a theory and I think it’s air tight.

This is all just a huge marketing scheme by the Mexicans. I know, sounds crazy but think about it. Coronavirus has already knocked out St. Patrick’s Day.

Now you toss in all the sports cancelled and people are going to go stir crazy fast. Maybe all the leagues shut down all through out April. No entertainment, no social gatherings, nothing. We’re all just stuck inside hating life until that one day. May 4th. We all wake up May 4th to the news that the Coronavirus is gone. Like a fart in the wind, it up and evaporated. What will everybody do when that happens? They will party right? And what is the very next day? Cinco De Mayo. We’ll all have had the word Corona top of mind for like 3 straight months. They won’t be able to keep it on the shelves. The Cinco De Mayo parties will last for weeks. It will be the greatest celebration the world has ever seen.

I know what you’re thinking, “But Kevin what about all the old people that died?” That’s the thing, they are really dead. Just when all the partying calms down and Corona is no longer a thought in our heads, BOOM!!. Mexico’s Day of The Dead will happen. All the old people we thought we lost suddenly come ‘back to life.’ Everyone is partying and drinking Mexico’s greatest export all over again.

If you see one flaw with this theory I’d love to hear it.

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