Mitchell Wilcox’s Scouting Report: “Struggles getting hands catch-ready.” Later Hit In Face With Football at Scouting Combine.

kylep1234

 

 

Follow @BrandedKyle

 

It’s rarely ever good when people synchronize an “OOOH” simultaneously at your expense. It’s a tough look to have a football ricochet off of your face at 20 mph when you’re looking to get paid to catch a football. It’s an even tougher look when your scouting report reads, “Struggles getting hands catch-ready when throws are on top of him” in the Weaknesses categories. I mean Lance Zierlein didn’t pull any punches on poor Mitch’s scouting report. Basically questioning the size of his manhood coming off the bat when he said has VERY small hands. Not just a couple of inches here or there. His hands look like Uncle Jack Kelly vs. the Lawyer in the Bird Law episode of Always Sunny. He’s uncoordinated, slug-footed, not strong enough, spotty hand placement, oversteps, and can’t bend properly for shit. Jesus Lance, Mitch has a family!

Screen Shot 2020-02-28 at 10.09.11 AM

 

Also, this Wilcox kid is a sex pistol! The surfer hair like you’ve seen on a Tommy Bahama billboard. Strong jaw that would break Tyson Fury’s hand and a mug that shouldn’t be covered by a helmet. Gotta get those hands up Mitch. Rule #1: Protect the money maker at all costs!

0 0 vote
Article Rating

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

0 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Next Post

Jungle Cruise Boat Sinks at Walt Disney World

This is in no way a Disney hit piece. As Branded’s official Disney blogger i feel compelled to defend the […]
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x
%d bloggers like this: