What Could Go Wrong: Joel Embiid Out Tonight vs Knicks, Could Be Out Longer

aidanepowers

This was inevitable, as you can hear Joel scream when he was fouled and wince as he shot the ensuing free throws:

 

I’m not sure if there is a God, and if there is I doubt He cares about basketball. But, I would like to speak to the higher power responsible for making Philadelphia sports a constant tragedy. In the past 365 days, every single player on every single team has gotten injured (no need to fact check this), the aforementioned God blew the basketball into the hoop after 4 bounces to end our season, our football season ended with our God loving quarterback getting speared in the back of the head, and this Sixers season has been the biggest debacle of them all. What is going on up there?

I don’t deserve this. I wake up and go to my job (I only threaten to kill around a measly three people in traffic). When I go to a restaurant, I don’t get a straw (you’re welcome, environment). I do my taxes (I give my W-2 to my dad). There is no reason I deserve to be punished by having to watch Al Horford play basketball. I did nothing wrong!

God, if you’re up there, this is no longer an irrelevant basketball issue. This is a mental health issue. I don’t know how you expect me to watch Tobias Harris and Al Horford and expect me to be okay and not sit in a dark room staring at walls.

They say God gives his toughest tests to his strongest angels. Well, I’m mentally and physically weak so He has clearly overestimated me. I would like to have the easy battle like rooting for the Bucks and Giannis. Not having to suffer through Embiid being out with an injury again.

Amen. (I think that’s how you pray. I only went to catholic school for a year.)

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