Doctors Report The First Known Case of a Person Who Urinates Alcohol

Science Alert: A woman in Pittsburgh has become the first documented case in a living person of an unusual medical condition where alcohol naturally brews in the bladder from the fermentation of yeast.

The condition, which researchers propose to call either ‘bladder fermentation syndrome’ or ‘urinary auto-brewery syndrome’, is similar to another incredibly rare condition, auto-brewery syndrome, where simply ingesting carbohydrates can be enough to make you inebriated, even without consuming any alcohol via regular means.

So let’s start with the question of, would you? And the answer is 100% yes. You have to drink this woman’s pee, if for nothing else but science. Now the article goes on to say she is 61 years old and I will admit, that is a little gross but you have to take the bad with the good. So toss a pint of grandma’s IPA in the fridge for an hour or two and have a couple sips. Throw an orange in there and you basically have a blue moon. (By in there I meant the beer not grandma but now that I’m typing this out maybe you have her eat a coupe just to be safe.)

Not saying you should want any type of disease buuuuuuuut, if you had to throw a dart at a board full of diseases, this is what you’re hoping to land on. Think about it, mimi goes down to Olive Garden for unlimited Soup and Bread sticks, she’s two sheets to the wind before she’s even tasted the Italian Wedding. This is the greatest thing that could ever happen to a college kid. No more spending an absurd amount of money at the bar trying to get a girl to go home with you. Get yourself a shorty from wawa and a couple french fries and you’re set!

You could even make a little business out of it. Natty Light is like what, $20 for a case? You get this and start charging your buddies $15 for a case of Matty Light. Have some really dense carbs and you’ll be able to make shots in your shorts. This is amazing. Sign me right up for this.

PS: Of course this is Pittsburgh, weirdest people in the world live in Pittsburgh, so no surprise they are pissing lagers up there.


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