Jennifer Aniston is still throwing high 90s cheddar on the black when she should be moving to the Bullpen this late in her career. How the hell is she 51? When I’m 51 I’m going to look like the Michelin Man mixed with Stephen Baldwin and Jen is here just going 12 rounds with Father Time, knocking him back on his heels. And while everyone her age is taking performance enhancers Jen’s looking like Ken Griffey Jr. and that beautiful swing taking her to the Hall of Fame. She was drafted as a late 1st round talent who the scouts had as a #3 starter, could maybe give you 20 wins once in her career. Instead, she remembered every team that passed on her and used that motivation to become a 1st ballot HOF.
What an absolute rocket! I’ll be honest I was all in from the get go. The cover photo just did it for me:
Can’t hate on a 51 year old just going crotch right in your face with a leather jacket putting the young chicks on notice that Rachel hasn’t lost a step.
Brad Pitt you fucking idiot! You let this timeless wonder go for an over the hill Lara Croft? Enjoy your 10 kids and the child support because your wife talked you into adopting the entire continent of Ethiopia.
This is what she looked like 20 years ago! 100% I would bang 51 year old Jen Aniston now before 20s Jen.