We’ve Got The 2020 Spanish Version Of Glass Joe vs. Mike Tyson



I was in on this video from the start once I saw this matchup we had on our hands. You take the Mountain from Game of Thrones and put him up against Bon Iver’s backup piano player, I knew this wasn’t going to end well. It started with a couple of guys just hamming it up, talking Spanish, probably wondering if Sergio Ramos could bring the Spain National team back to prominence. Or maybe where the Mountain was watching the Super Bowl.


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Then all hell broke loose as the guy with the Pooka Shell necklace goes in with the nurple?! How about the balls on this guy! What a move to start off, totally caught the Mountain off guard. I immediately shielded my eyes because I thought we were going to watch someone’s head fly off their neck like a Rock ‘Em, Sock ‘Em robot. I wondered if I was going to be an accessory to murder for watching. Instead the Mountain let him slide for strike 1. Realizing a little titty honk isn’t worth getting so bent out of shape over.


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But this one very quickly turned bad by the time Jay Baruchel started doing the robot in a dark Barcelona alleyway.


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And once he got too close to the Mountain it was all over. He literally looked like the priest in The Exorcist shouting the, “The power of Christ compels you!” I’ve never seen a human body bend like that.


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But that didn’t stop the ambassador for Fashion Nova. Who cares he just got thrown over the Spanish border into Portugal, he wanted more. So he collected himself, wiped off thousands of years of Catillian dust off his Calvins, and went to go challenge the Mountain. Big Mistake.

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**record scratch**

I bet you’re wondering how I got here…

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The Mountain sent this guy cuddling with a sewer drain. I hope he wakes up with Spanish poop water in his mouth. I hope the bar our bouncer friend works at has direct plumbing to this sewer. And after he got finished with this kid I hope he took a huge dump in the bar bathroom that clogged up all the Spanish sewers within a three block radius so badly it overflowed onto the little guy. That seems like retribution enough.


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P.S. I think that’s Spain? The patch on the guys arm definitely looks like Spain.


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Spain confirmed. Shoutout to me for paying attention in “World Cultures” in 10th grade.

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