The Patriots Care More About Winning Oscars Than Winning Today’s Playoff Game



When did Robert Kraft sell out to 20th Century Fox? Because these motion pictures that the Patriots are putting out today would make Spielberg blush with the amount of special effects used in it. Julian Edelman can’t even pick up his arm because his shoulder is a mess and he’s out here on Adobe Premier using that mobility to find old Super Bowl highlights when he should be in the cold tub. Tom Brady probably hasn’t game-planned because he was spending all week making sure Christopher Walken was pronouncing lion correctly.

I cannot believe a once proud organization has shrunk itself to become so self-absorbed that they would take Oscars awards over playoff wins. Seems like there is some trouble in paradise since Tom and Edelman both released competing movies on the same day. It’s like when 50 Cent released his album on the same day Kanye West did and told everyone he’d retire if he didn’t sell more than Kanye on the first day. Tom is absolutely bodybagging Julian in the numbers game. Quick look: Tom’s going to be at 100k+ favorites by the time Mike Vrabel ends the dynasty today. Julian Edelman’s engagement wouldn’t even get him a Golden Globe nomination. Trouble in paradise?

I honestly can’t believe what the Patriots have become. It’s already been a drastically bad 12-4 season. They are playing their first Divisional round game in 10 years. Now both of their shoulders are hanging by a thread because they’re jacking off to themselves in the mirror constantly. Mike Vrabel on the other hand would cut off his dick for a Super Bowl win. He’s the salt of the earth, 9 to 5, bacon and eggs the Patriots dynasty used to be.

R.I.P New England, it was a good run.

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