Wanted: Man depicted in NSFW video setting the Internet ablaze. If you know the identity of this man, please let us know ASAP. We would like to offer him up to $100,000 to star in a nude cam show. @barstoolsports @barstoolradio pic.twitter.com/a2lxQGh1p3
— CamSoda (@CamSodaLive) December 16, 2019
Dave isn’t going to go for this offer. $100K is one zero away from where talks can get real for Portnoy to consider this. But to play Devil’s advocate if he did jump on a Cam Soda stream for an hour and was slinging dick around, it would be the most watched live stream ever. By a mile. Millions upon millions of views. It would be scheduled content. But not enough money and too many risk factors.
First off there is no where to go but down from the 8 second clip we all saw. Those might be the greatest 8 seconds any man has put on film in the history of porn. You try and extend that level of performance for an additional 59 minutes and 52 seconds, you’re just going to get a slice of disappointing pie. Also there would be too many gifs, memes and jokes to come out of it that would knock Portnoy down a rung.
Davey Dick needs to just ride off into the sunset with this tape. If it was him of course. Whoever the man is I tip my cap to you sir. You showed an impressive level of athleticism, flexibility and care for others. He clearly knows how to treat a lady and if I had to guess I’d say there will be a line of ladies looking for the same treatment.
All things coming up Portnoy, maybe.