Joel Embiid Is Now The Mayor Of Boston

The Sixers went into Boston and took it to the #1 team in the Eastern Conference! The Celtics were undefeated at home? Donnnnnn’t care. Pretty sure the Sixers haven’t won in Boston since the 90s and they made easy work of them. Joel Embiid answered all the talk from Shaq and Chuck and taped his Cameroonian shvitz to his leg so it wouldn’t bitch slap anyone on the way to 38 & 13. Ben Simmons hit TWO clutch free throws to ice it. Ben. Simmons. Clutch. Free Throws. All that shit Jaylen Brown talked earlier in the week? He didn’t even bother getting off the plane. Eddie could score eight points in 41 minutes.

The Southie Ball Boy would’ve given more effort tonight.

The fact that Boston has only Birdman Lite and Enes Kanter to throw at JoJo is a slap in the face to basketball. Come playoff time with Horford and Embiid on the floor at the same time the Sixers might take the NBA back to the mid-90s and dominate the paint. Tobias Harris was an outstanding compliment to Embiid all night. Love myself a Mike Scott game! 5/7 from three, gave great minutes, and hit big shots in key moments. Everyone knows the season starts in mid-December and the Sixers came out with a statement win at a place that’s given them trouble forever. The Sixers own Massachusetts! The Sixers own the Celtics! And in no time they’ll be owning the East!

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