Orlando Sentinel: “LPD, of Tennessee, assisted in the arrest of Andy Perry who tried unsuccessfully to flush methamphetamine along with several items of paraphernalia down the toilet, LPD wrote in a Facebook post.
What scares LPD further is the possibility of meth reaching the Tennessee River where it could be consumed by alligators. “They’ve had enough methed up animals the past few weeks without our help,” LPD said. “If you need to dispose of your drugs just give us a call and we will make sure they are disposed of in the proper way.”
Could have went m entire life without knowing this. Nothing, and I mean nothing, worse than an alligator hopped up on some meth. I assume it would just end up looking like the creator from that Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle movie.
As science tells us, regular alligators can be ornery due to their enlarged medulla oblongata. So can you imagine one that’s got the Devil’s cotton candy pumping through it’s veins. You see an alligator acting unusual, maybe trying to break into your car or offering you a claw job for $5. Call the police right away or run or both. Don’t try and kill it. Meth gators can’t simply be killed.
With that being said, if you do have drugs that need to be disposed of, don’t call the LPD. You’re the biggest idiot on the planet if you have drugs and call the cops to get rid of them for you. You’ll be in handcuffs before you can say “over here sir.” And if they are somehow telling the truth and just take your drugs, you’re definitely ended up on some type of list. You’re eventually going to get arrested. So what’s it going to be? Create meth gators or go to jail?
Pros of meth gators: They will keep the police busy for you to do more meth.
Cons of meth gators: Meth gators
Pros of going to jail: Much less likely to run into a meth gator
Cons of going to jail: Jail absolutely stinks and you can’t do your meth
Tough choices out here. Either way, good luck and head on a swivel.