The One Where Jordan Speaks Welsh
Welcome to the CGS Blog. We’ve been a little preoccupied lately but we
finally got this one done. When I say we, I of course mean Maynerd. Anyway, we’d
like to drop a big thank you to our special guest Summer or as she’s more
infamously known, Brunette Bohemian. You know, the one with the hair and
unhealthy obsession with New Kids on the Block? Yeah, that one. In this episode, we
talk about a creature from just north of her homeland, The Loch Ness Monster. The
second biggest pile of shit in the entire UK. Sorry if you’re a believer but this one
couldn’t be any more disproven if they drained the damn lake.
Having said that, there’s nothing more fun than an enduring mystery like
Loch Ness, Big Foot, and whatever kind of monster enjoys candy corn. Everyone
loves a little weirdness and Scotland sure loves it because they desperately need
your tourist dollars. They aren’t exactly winning it with bag pipes and haggis.
Frankly, it’s not unheard of to capitalize on nonsense to make money. There are men
in Tibet who are actually designated “Yeti Witnesses”. Their only job is to convince
guys like Maynerd that there’s a fluffy snow monster living high in the Himalayan
I personally don’t think we have enough monsters. Every region of the US
should have their own dedicated cryptid. Like a mascot. Massachusetts could have a
lobster-man, Colorado could have a rock monster, and Florida could have… a naked
guy throwing poop at an old folks home… on second thought that is way too normal
for Florida but you get the idea.
Anyway, shoot me a tweet @bastardprophet with your invented regional
monster. My favorite ones will get a shout out on Episode 23 of CGS.
Your Friendly Neighborhood Sarge