Did you see last night's story?! How long do you think Jeff is going to be stuck up there?!https://t.co/gORRI0VpkC
— Tessa DiTirro (@Local12Tessa) October 8, 2019
According to Tessa DiTirro of WKRC, Jeff Lanham is living in a tent on the roof above his Hog Rock Cafe restaurant until the 0-5 Bengals find the win column. He plans on eating food from the restaurant and has amenities such as a phone charger, air mattress, blankets and a heater.
Nothing could have been better for this guy than the Bengals opening the season 0-5. He must think we are all as dumb as his wife for believing that he’s doing this as a punishment instead of as an excuse to live out his dream life of living on top of a bar.
Drawing inspiration from Cincinnati legend Wildman Walker, who lived for 61 days on a billboard until the Bengals won their first game 9 weeks into the season, Jeff Lanham will really stick it to the Bengals this time.
“Well, 1991 Wildman Walker did it, and I was drunk in a bar one night and said something I shouldn’t have said, and this is where I’m at,” Lanham said.
Jeff is living up to his word and pitching a tent on the roof of the Hog Rock Cafe. He will live up there for the foreseeable future. He will sleep and hang out all day, he will eat food from his restaurant below and occasionally hear entertainment from the local bands. The only thing he doesn’t have on the roof is a bathroom.
“There’s a bathroom upstairs I can go to so I won’t have to fly a port-a-let up here,” said Jeff.
He will come off the roof to use the restroom, attend to his business commitments and go to Bengals tailgates.
What a man of his word that Jeff. Willing to leave his loving marriage with his wife to sleep and hang out all day on the roof of a restaurant/bar where live music plays below and there is convenient access to a bathroom. It even says his TV is coming in soon. There is little to no difference between his actual home and this insufferable punishment except that he “needs something specific to get down.” He basically just has an affordable apartment with a dining plan at this point.
No one is rooting harder against his own team than Jeff. The Bengals next three games are against the Ravens, Gardener Minshew’s Jags and then the Rams. After that is a bye week. All very losable. Jeff just might be out on his air mattress eating takeout and drinking beer for another month. How will he possibly survive.
Now I want the Bengals to win just so Jeff is confronted with a real decision of making up another protest or going home to his wife. I think I already know the answer and I think so does Jeff.
“Oh, I know he’s crazy. I mean, yeah, to do something like this,” said Chrissy Lanham, Jeff’s wife.
Ultimately I think this plan might backfire for him. His wife doesn’t have to deal with his drunk ass coming home from the restaurant and she doesn’t have to cook him any meals. She’s 100% banging his friend anyways. Bengals just might get the last laugh this time.