The Eagles Sh*t List

Welcome to the Eagles shit list people. This will be a running list of all the players/personnel that are ruining my god damn Sunday’s. It some times takes more than a poorly timed penalty to get on the list, other times it only takes one dropped pass. Don’t worry, once a person finds themselves not the SL they aren’t stuck there forever. Just like america I believe in second chances. Here’s the current Eagles Shit List:

– Ronald Darby: It will take an act of god to get him off this list. He’ll need to make a Malcolm Butler Super Bowl winning interception to get off this list. Darby stinks out loud. Even the announcers yesterday commented on how the Lions we’re picking on Darby. No fucking shit. The guy couldn’t cover Stephen Hawking. RIP.

– Nelson: He was on the list after the Falcons game and half Leah through yesterday’s fartfest he was practically tattooed there. Then he made a few nice plays so I decided he’s still on the list but I removed his last name. Like the halfway house version of the shit list.

– Miles Sanders: This one hurts because we all want to love this kid so much. But butter fucking fingers over here couldn’t hold on to a football if I Tim McGraw duct taped it to his has like that scene from Friday Night Lights.

– Dallas Goedert: Another idiot with a big time drop yesterday. This add to the list maybe more about frustration and I’d expect him to be off the list sooner rather than later. But until then, get on the jugs machine for the love of God. And for everyone that is going to bring up the Ertz drop, yes it pissed me right off but he gets a pass for that due to years of being the best TE in football. Another drop maybe he gets added but not for one drop.

That’s everyone on the list right now. I could add more but I like to keep the body count low so that I can hate each one with more passion. Heading into a short week going to Green Bay has all the feelings of the Saints game last year. Wouldn’t be surprised if this team just lays down and dies Thursday night. Not saying this is a must win game but if they don’t win the entire season is over and 2019 will be a complete failure. So yeah kinda important I guess.


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