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We’re All Gonna Be Dead by 2050

There was an article making its rounds today and maybe yesterday too about how the world will end by 2050 blah blah fucking blah. If the world is gonna end in 2050 tell me in like 2045, it’s 2019 and honestly 2025 doesn’t even sound like a real year to me so 2050 is beyond fake. I’ve lived through Y2K, the Mayan calendar bullshit in 2012 and several random lunatics who are no doubt dead now and not once did I bat an eye so if you think telling me we’re all gonna die in thirty years will affect my life at all you are sadly mistaken my friend.

What might an accurate worst-case picture of the planet’s climate-addled future actually look like, then? The authors provide one particularly grim scenario that begins with world governments “politely ignoring” the advice of scientists and the will of the public to decarbonize the economy (finding alternative energy sources), resulting in a global temperature increase 5.4 F (3 C) by the year 2050. At this point, the world’s ice sheets vanish; brutal droughts kill many of the trees in the Amazon rainforest (removing one of the world’s largest carbon offsets); and the planet plunges into a feedback loop of ever-hotter, ever-deadlier conditions.

“Thirty-five percent of the global land area, and 55 percent of the global population, are subject to more than 20 days a year of lethal heat conditions, beyond the threshold of human survivability,” the authors hypothesized.

Meanwhile, droughts, floods and wildfires regularly ravage the land. Nearly one-third of the world’s land surface turns to desert. Entire ecosystems collapse, beginning with the planet’s coral reefs, the rainforest and the Arctic ice sheets. The world’s tropics are hit hardest by these new climate extremes, destroying the region’s agriculture and turning more than 1 billion people into refugees.

This mass movement of refugees — coupled with shrinking coastlines and severe drops in food and water availability — begin to stress the fabric of the world’s largest nations, including the United States. Armed conflicts over resources, perhaps culminating in nuclear war, are likely.

The result, according to the new paper, is “outright chaos” and perhaps “the end of human global civilization as we know it.”

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Ignoring all of the actual science and pretty much anything that would concern most people, I am a weirdo on the internet so I only have one question. Nature, why is it taking so long? I mean you know people, I know people, people are THE WORST. If we’re all gonna die why do we have to wait? I need the scientists to come back and say that 2050 was a typo and we’re all gonna die in like 5 months. Humans have had a nice run, honestly we’ve been kind of running up the score and I’m not really convinced the world ending is the worse thing that could happen.

 

Link to full end of the world article.

@EJS_4

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