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Double Shot At Love With DJ Pauly D And Vinny Episode 4 Recap: Fighting In A Facemask

BadGalAli

To open the episode the ladies are at the mansion tanning, swimming, drinking, and talking shit. The core to any good reality TV show. A girl who’s name I forgot is talking and the name “Brittnay” came up on the screen. Was that a typo or is this bitch really named Brittnay?

The boyz come over for another challenge where they are actually the ones competing and I think it’s just another excuse to see them with no shirts. Every since Vinny became the Keto Guido he uses every opportunity to be shirtless. I think the rule is only one Jersey Shore cast member can be the abs of the group at a time. For so long The Situation sat in the iron throne but use any Game of Thrones reference you want, Vinny is out to be the new ab guy.

The challenge is that they DJ Pauly D and Vinny are going to be tied up over a pool of hair gel and see who can hold up the longest. It’s a very Big Brother challenge and I’m here for it. One of the girls is practically cat calling the guys saying how excited she is to be standing behind them and looking at their “peaches”. These girls are freaks.

Naturally, Pauly D demolishes Vinny and has absolutely no problem hanging on this thing. You have to imagine Pauly has amazing triceps and tricep endurance after doing his hair like that every single day.

Pauly picks Derynn to go on a one on one date. If you don’t remember she was the one crawling on the floor and talking to plants on night 1. We’ve come a long way.

Holly seems to actually like Pauly so she pulls him aside to try to get to know him. She’s definitely crazy but seems like a nice girl. You can tell Pauly feels bad because he doesn’t want to be an asshole but he does not like her. It’s not going to end well for Holly. I hope Bachelor In Paradise or Ex On The Beach snatches her up.

OK the one on one date is happening and they are not even leaving the house? The date is on a fake pedal swan boat in their average sized pool with all the other girls staring through the window of the house. Now that I think of it have they left the house at all? No wonder that other girl went crazy about her organic chicken.

The girls back at the house are looking for drama to start and one girl decides to tell all the girls that one of the other girls said Pauly told her he thinks Holly, the weird girl, is weird. Got that? Holly is not handling things well and is definitely a ticking time bomb. She’s running around the house in sweatpants and no makeup trying to confront Pauly for something she should just ignore and move on. She’s about to self destruct.

Even though Pauly implied Holly was weird, because she is weird, he’s trying to convince Holly not to believe that. He gives a truly inspirational speech that almost made me tear up honestly. “I like weird. I am weird.” I fucking love being weird. When someone calls me weird I take it as a compliment. If you aren’t weird I don’t want to be friends with you.

Upstairs, Nikki is putting on a purple face mask that I am very interested in and if she could send me the Sephora link so I can purchase with the 15% VIB sale that would be great. The girls want to have a family meeting to confront Nikki but she caught on to the situation and called the girls out while clarifying her skin. She goes outside to confront Pauly about it and he is basically just like please chill the fuck out and also it’s time to peel the mask off girl.

While everyone is focused on drama, Maria is focused on that D. Her and Vinny sneak behind a very narrow tree to heavily make out in front of a huge camera crew but for some reason Maria is very confident no one saw her. Either that or she’s just trolling us.

Back to the drama the rest of the house is really over Nikki’s bullshit and also extremely hungry. They alternate between screaming at each other and shoveling food into their mouths.

With all of this going on it’s easy to forget there is a cab ceremony to be had. Back to the barbershop we go. By official count I believe this is the 4th haircut of the season.

Random group texts are sent until everyone starts to realize the two girls that are best friends in the house, Nadya and Suzi, are about to be bottom 2 and get split up. Dancing on my own plays loudly as Nadya’s cab pulls away.

@aliweitz

@badgalstoolie

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