“Reporter” Chris Sheridan Wrote A Totally False Made Up Story About The Sixers, Brett Brown and Ben Simmons Because That’s What Hacks Do

I woke up this morning to a lot of Sixers twitter pissed off.  People bashing someone named Chris Sheridan.  Having zero clue who he is I had to look him up.  That was pretty tough because this Chris Sheridan is the least famous of the Chris Sheridan tribe and nobody really know’s who he is.  Now that’s not his fault, nobody knows who I am but that’s because I just started.  Chris here looks like a John Waters without the stache.

Tell me I’m wrong?  Anyway, once I found Chris this is what he said…

I will be 110% honest I had some preconceived notions going into clicking on this.  Twitter had all ready called it a bullshit article and people were ripping the thin-skinned mother fucker apart.  (I don’t know if he’s thin skinned, but since Chris likes to just say things with no proof..)


Chris is…

  • Afraid of dogs (Allegedly)
  • Loves cats (Allegedly)
  • Hates Christmas (Allegedly)
  • Rooted for the Germans in Saving Private Ryan (Allegedly)
  • His favorite character on TV was Skyler White (Allegedly)
  • He’s a guttersnip (Allegedly)
  • He is a vegan (Allegedly)
  • Water makes him gassy (Allegedly)
  • He was the guy who got the handjob from the dad in that Netflix doc (Allegedly)
  • That’s not his real hair (Allegedly)
  • When Stone Cold Steve Austin asks for a hell yeah, he doesn’t do it (Allegedly)
  • Harry Mayes kicked his ass (Allegedly)

These are all totally possibly maybe 100% true, or maybe they are fake.  I have no clue because I’m as much a reporter as Chris.  Anyway, let me get into some of the bogus writing of one Chris Sheridan..

“But the Sixers are a mess internally, with Brown having long ago lost the locker room following the acquisition of Jimmy Butler, but before the acquisition of Tobias Harris. The breaking point came at a game in Portland when Brown had Bruce Bowen address the team about “San Antonio Spurs culture” – a speech that went over like a lead balloon to such an extent that Joel Embiid and Bowen got into each other‘s faces.”

LOL! Ok so Brett “Long ago lost the locker room?”  Let’s ignore the fact that at halftime of game 2 he cursed them boys out something fierce and went on to have a 51 point 3rd quarter.  Are you a moron Chris, do you take us to be morons?  You look like a moron but tell me something, are you a moron?  Just lie for the sake of it I guess.  How do i know that?  Because Bowen never spoke to the GOD DAMN TEAM! He was invited too.  He never did.  Oh yeah…. Bowen was invited to speak to them in San Antonio not Portland you monkeys anus.

“The degree to which Brown lost the locker room was amplified on March 25 when Ben Simmons sat out a 21-point loss to the Orlando Magic due to a “stomach virus.”
In actuality, a source close to the team told the Daily News, Simmons had spent the previous night partying in Orlando. The “stomach virus” was a fallacy, although that is nothing new for the Sixers organization. They used to do the same thing when Allen Iverson was partying and gambling his nights away in Atlantic City and showing up for practice hung over. Larry Brown was the mastermind of those cover-ups, although the stories eventually came out.”

What’s this guys deal?  None of that happened with Ben.  He wasn’t out partying or doing anything.  Anyone that follows Ben on social media saw he was relaxing that night doing nothing.  Nobody told Chris this he just tried to find the one game Ben missed mid-season so he could talk some shit.  That’s a disgrace.  Further more Chris was so unsure he originally said Ben was partying in Miami and had to correct it in the article.  Because Chris is a fraud.
“A source who spoke to the Daily News on condition of anonymity said general manager Elton Brand made it known to ownership sometime before the trade deadline that the organization needed to consider trading Simmons because the youngster was simply not coachable, and was a regular-season player annually exposed in the playoffs.”
Ben is “annually” exposed in the playoffs according to your source?  Really, annually?  The playoffs he has been in one time in his first season?  The playoffs where he has had 2 full series and the first series he was the best player in the entire series?  That’s annually?  This is such a high pile of shit that my nose hairs are being burned off.
Now this next part really makes me laugh…

“The blame for that one falls on Sean Marks, who could have traded Kenneth Faried for a legit backup center such as Enes Kanter back when he had the chance. Instead, Faried was waived and has been doing big things for the Houston Rockets.

But back to the Sixers: Ever wonder why Simmons is such a poor free throw shooter? It is because he does not bend his knees. Countless coaches have tried to tell Simmons that bending his knees would solve his problems, but he refuses to listen.  

The same thing that happened with Iverson and Brown is now happening with the Sixers in regards to Simmons and Brown, and it is making it all that much easier for the Nets to potentially be the team that sends Brett Brown into coaching purgatory.”

Oh really? Enes Fucking Kanter was going to stop Joel Embiid?  That was going to be the huge weapon that Nets used?  Give me a fucking break.  On top of that you’re a real journalist and you transition out of the blue too, “Ever wonder why Ben can’t shoot free throws”  You’re a real life clown Chris.  You’re jail tissue, your face is jail tissue. It’s really something unreal to me that an actual capital J Journalist could lie about this stuff and it be no problem.

Hey Chris from the bottom of my heart and I mean this with 100% honesty.  Get bent bitch.




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