Self Proclaimed “Sandwich Expert” Refuses to use Cheese

So this asshole, Max Halley, owner of Max’s Sandwich Shop in London refuses to put cheese on his sandwiches because he claims his sandwiches are so damn good, that they don’t even need cheese. 

Hey Max, here’s a tip for you – suck me.  Cheese is an absolutely crucial part to any sandwich.  I mean, just listen to the names:  ham & CHEESE, CHEESEsteak, grilled CHEESE, turkey & CHEESE.  I could go on and on.

Max is trying to create this “anti-cheese” movement and I’ll tell you right now – you have a better chance of me joining ISIS than going sans cheese for the rest of my life.  If some anti-cheese militia ends up forming, you can mark my words:  I will find them all, round them up, and throw them all in a huge vat of melted cheddar, and make them eat their way out if they want to survive.

Max, the “sandwich expert” (HA HA HA) is quoted saying “Cheese for me is practically the spawn of Satan.”  I mean, come on dude.  That’s a little extreme.  You know how much worse shit there is in this world than cheese?  PEOPLE EAT FUNGUS THAT GROWS ON SHIT.  I bet you put mushrooms on your sandwiches, don’t you?  You put SHIT FUNGUS on your sammies, but you don’t use cheese.  Get the fuck out of here, Max.  You don’t deserve the title “sandwich expert.”

Here’s a video of Max trying to explain why he’s so against cheese.  If you have five minutes to spare, take a gander at this moron and his cheese-less ways, and form your own opinion.  I can tell you right now, if you decide to delete cheese from your sandwiches because of this guy, you can delete yourself from my life.


Shut up, Max.


Featured Photo – Food Insider Twitter @InsiderFood


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