LeBron’s thottourage has been growing at the same rate as his hairline receded. Emily Ratajkowski and Halsey have been competing for his attention since the moment he stepped foot in LA, but no one is going to activate playoff LeBron more than the biggest LeBron fan herself, Rihanna.
I’ve long said being a LeBron fan is Rihanna’s biggest weakness. Otherwise, she’s perfect at every level. It should help other women feel better about themselves. Even the hottest woman on the planet has one flaw.
BadGalRiri is not a Lakers fan. While I find it hard to overcome her allegiance to LeBron, at least she’s consistent. She’s been the leader of the thottourage since day 1. Savannah James may be able to handle Emily and Halsey, but she’s no match for Riri.
After Rihanna was in the building for the Lakers comeback win against the Rockets last night, probably still celebrating her birthday, it’s clear she is the one that has activated the Lakers playoff mode.
I mean, judge for yourself. Does this look like the type of energy and effort that’s going to get this team to the playoffs?
Playoff mode: FULLY ACTIVATED pic.twitter.com/MkYKzBirYH
— Barstool Sports (@barstoolsports) February 22, 2019
I competed harder for rebounds while on my way to the rebounding award at URI girls basketball camp, not to brag. LeBron may think he’s the key to the Lakers playoff hopes, but if you ask me this is the effort the Lakers truly needed last night.
Rihanna and Jen after the Lakers win 😂 pic.twitter.com/BaSNuNNRry
— T. (@WAlTURTURN) February 22, 2019
Chills. Rihanna may be a bandwagon Lakers fan but this is the freshest jersey of all time and I’m wondering if I have to make a custom Badgalali jersey to match.
As long as Rihanna is in the building to keep the team motivated I don’t see a chance the Lakers don’t make the playoffs. If LeBron had traded away the entire team I would certainly have given Rihanna a shot at point guard out of respect. Jeff Van Gundy can’t keep it together when she walks by, so the rest of the NBA is now on notice.
Rihanna walked by looking like a snack, and Jeff Van Gundy was ready to risk it all. 😱pic.twitter.com/zkE9xkAmGc
— TPS (@TotalProSports) June 2, 2017
I wonder how Rihanna’s Saudi Arabian billionaire boyfriend feels about her wearing another mans jersey? Well, it doesn’t look like he minded too much but it was enough for him to demand they sit in a box instead of courtside.
All of this has got me wondering: is Rihanna responsible for the amount of wine LeBron has been drinking lately? Everyone knows Rihanna is the biggest wine drinker around, consistently stealing wine glasses from restaurants and hotels.
I’m just putting two and two together here and I think I just uncovered a secret relationship between LeBron and Rihanna. I wouldn’t be mad at Rihanna, just very disappointed. Look at what LeBron is doing to the Lakers? Rihanna has got an album to finish, and I don’t want LeBron and his tampering, injured groin anywhere near it.