I’m About To Go On A Damn Hunger Strike Until Machado Signs (Hopefully The White Sox)


It has been 94 days since MLB free agency officially began and Manny Machado STILL hasn’t signed with anyone.

Now, I’ve given up hope on Bryce Harper. That dude keeps trolling everyone (well, Philly fans actually) with his MLB The Show video game posts, tweeting that he told his decision to Tony Romo and wears Chicago hats every damn day – but I just don’t see him on the Sox. I think he either goes to Philly or just stays put in Washington.

So, now my focus is on Machado. The White Sox are the only known team out there who has made an offer to the third baseman/short stop and let’s be real: nobody really knows what it is. I assume it’s big and I assume it’s way bigger than any amount I’ll ever fucking make.

But, these 94 days have been agonizing and downright awful. I’m tired of waiting and I can’t take it any longer.

Which is why…for the sake of baseball…I’m going on a hunger strike until Machado signs.

The human body can survive without food for 3 weeks (I had to Google it).

Human body food

If I start today, that will put me at February 26th – almost 10 days into the Sox spring training. Why am I picking to start tomorrow? Because it still gives Machado enough time to get ready for the season. Honestly, I should have started earlier, but I thought this damn waiting game would be over by now.

Will Machado care that the life of some 24 year-old blogger is on his hands if he doesn’t sign by February 26th? Nah. He won’t. And that’s why I want him on the White Sox. I want the attitude. I want the occasional dirty play. I want the fights.

Image result for machado fight gif

If he doesn’t sign with the Sox by that date and I went hungry that entire time for some other team…well…that would suck balls.

But at least this shit will finally be over and I do need to lose some weight…that could work, right?

Find us on Twitter @branded_sports and see if I survive the #MachadoHungerStrike by following me @ekurbyun 

Featured Image: Edited from AP / Patrick Semansky and a selfie-I took-of-myself-waiting-for-my-bus-when-it was-snowing-metric-fuck-tons-of-snow-outside-in-Chicago

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