*Sarcasm* Yea, great Super Bowl…. I could give two fucks about either team. It was actually the most boring Super Bowl I have ever seen until the last 4 minutes. All I really cared about was if my box numbers hit. They didn’t. So fuck me right??? I lost $500. BUT, I drank a lot of beer, did a lot of lemon drop shots and ate a lot of wings and spinach & artichoke dip so at least that’s positive. Also, I had some banging mozzarella sticks. The cheese stretched at least 8 inches so I was happy about that. That was the second best part of the Super Bowl for me-my mozzarella sticks.
You wanna know what MADE THE DAMN SUPER BOWL though??!?
Adam “the hottest man alive” Levine. That’s who.
I actually missed the first half of the Super Bowl half time show with some dudes named “Big Boi” and Travis Scott who I heard were terrible. Don’t even know who they are. Don’t really care. I just wanted to make it back to my television in time to see Adam Levine because I happen to love him.
Soooooooooooooo……..I really don’t care if he sounded horrible….Can we just discuss how amazing he looked when he ripped his ugly tank top off??
Look at that hip movement. Damn. Although the halftime show pretty much sucked this year, Adam Levine still looked amazing and proved why he’s so many womens hall pass.
So many people are talking shit about how “ohhhh Janet Jackson couldn’t show her nipples at her halftime show but Adam can?”…. YEAH HE CAN CAUSE IT’S DIFFERENT. A shirtless man is very different than a woman with her boobs out people. Have you ever been to the beach!???????? God, shut up….And let us enjoy Adam Levine’s nipples.
Also, as much as it pains me to say this, Congrats to Pats fans. Edelman deserved to be the MVP of that game 100%. I do happen to have a few friends who are diehards. In fact, one of my good friends was actually AT the Super Bowl ON her birthday and she’s FROM Boston so I’m happy for her and that’s about it.
The last 4 minutes of the entire game was basically the entire Super Bowl so well done on not making it 100% comparable to watching paint dry. It was only 90% that boring.
So, in conclusion, Adam Levine is hot.