Tom Brady Is Officially A 1,000 Yard Rusher (For Now)

In New England, there’s not too many record setting performances that can still get our juices flowing anymore. Tom Brady’s race to 1,000 yards rushing over his 19 year career has been a storyline to follow over the last few months. Brady hasn’t been shy about wanting to get to 1,000, which is how I know he still has more than enough left in the tank.

Finally, on a 3rd and 3, Tom Brady put his foot on the gas and joined an elite club of quarterbacks such as Michael Vick and Donovan McNabb with an impressive rushing record.

As a Patriots fan it’s our duty to spend countless hours debating why Tom Brady is the best quarterback of all time and defend his honor against the patriarchy of the NFL. Nothing gets us more fired up than watching the look in Tom Brady’s eyes when he realizes he’s open for a few yards in the middle of the field. A Tom Brady 1 yard rushing touchdown? Better than a Gronk spike.

Brady finally said a big fuck you to the haters in this video who doubted he could get to 1,000 yards.

The NFL doesn’t really have anything else going on at the moment, so they spent a lot of time with this congratulatory video for the occasion. Oh, The Checkdown made this video? Makes more sense for the NFL to not acknowledge Tom Brady’s milestone with even just a laminated printout and sideline ceremony.

There are too many memories within that 1,000 yards.

Perhaps my favorite Tom Brady run was against the Baltimore Ravens in the 2015 playoffs, mostly because like Jason Witten usually likes the mention, I was there. Something about scoring on a defense that has Terrell Suggs on the field that gets that Patriot blood pumping. To be completely honest I was already having a full mental breakdown convinced the Pats would never come back down 14 against the Ravens in the playoffs but when they did it not once but twice in this game, I learned what unconditional love meant.


Some of the runs aren’t impressive feats of athleticism, I know. It’s the QB sneaks and goal line touchdowns that have been the reason it’s taken Brady so long to get to 1,000. They aren’t all pretty, but they get the job done. Tom Brady is the most clutch quarterback in the biggest situations and he’s not afraid to put his life on the line going up the middle against Ray Lewis, a confirmed murderer.

But then there are the Brady runs that just can’t help but put a smile on your face.


Everyone agrees that Tom Brady solidified his reputation as a running threat way back in 2006. Brian Urlacher is a hall of fame linebacker and this juke by Tom Brady is probably what kids these days remember him from.

I’m imagining Tom Brady as a grandfather of some bratty rich kids in Brookline,  whining about getting avocado ice cream sitting in their Aston Martin, pulling up this YouTube video to prove he wasn’t the one to fuck with back in the day so they better listen to him.

And now that he’s finally reached that rushing milestone, there’s not a chance he’s losing any more yards.

So since no one inside the New England Patriots is allowed to give Brady any praise for this accomplishment…

…it’s our job as fans to celebrate every minute statistic from our Lord and savoir Tom Brady.

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