After going 5-3 to open the first half of the season, the Bears are ready to mess shit up in the NFC North.
With the next 3 games taking place against the Lions, Vikings and Lions again, the Monsters of the Midway can put themselves in a sweet spot atop the division.
First up, the Matt Patricia-led Lions. Here are my thoughts on today’s game.
Our Outside Linebacker and Savior RETURNS: Oh, glorious day, this Sunday is. Our Outside Linebacker and Savior is back. After campaigning for his rest against the Jets and Bills, I’ve been waiting to write that Khalil Mack is back on the field. According to everything I’ve read and heard this week, Mack is back to normal and ready to beat that ass on the field. #52 is getting quite the bone to play with in his return – a Lions offensive line that gave up 10 – yes, 10 – sacks to the Vikings last week that is also without starting guard T.J. Lang. Here’s to celebrating and worshipping the return of Our Outside Linebacker and Savior.
Allen Robinson is back; is Shaheen gonna play?: And guess what? More killers are back! Allen Robinson also will be making his return after being sidelined the past two weeks with a groin injury. QB10 will finally have his #1 receiver back which means more potential tuddies. I’m also curious if 6’5 giant Adam Shaheen is going to play as he returns from IR after rolling the fuck out of his ankle in the preseason. I saw a lot of potential in Shaheen last year and liked the chemistry he was building with Mitchell Trubisky in their rookie season together. Pair him with Trey Burton and we could have a lethal tight end duo on our hands.
The Bears are in a good spot: Gotta say, even though they should have won at least two out of their three losses, the Bears are in a good spot right now. Does that mean I’m SUPER confident that they’re gonna ride this shit out easily? No. But I do feel good about this team sitting at 5-3 after the first half of the season. If you told me that was gonna happen before training camp started, I would have punched you in the dick and said that’s not true. Well, not really, but you get the point. All I’m saying is…things are looking up are going better than we thought they would.
Detroit’s O-Line has suckeddddd: Let’s get this out of the way – the Lion’s offensive line has looked like more like lion shit. Fuck, was that game bad last week against the Vikings. 10 SACKS. TEN! 1-0. T-E-N. I’m still not over that. The most I had ever seen was when Jay Cutler was sacked 9 times by the Giants defense (when they used to be good) back in 2010. I sure fucking hope they come prepared for their own sake, but Khalil Mack is hungry after being starved, and he wants a nice, big ol’ serving of Matthew Stafford.
The Bears need to beat the Lions already: The Bears have lost 3 of their last 4 meetings with the Lions. You think I would have known this, but I had no freaking idea. How the hell did this happened? I’m so used to the Bears kicking the Lions ass and I want to start getting used to it again today.
Matt Patricia sucks: I don’t care what anyone says, Matt Patricia hasn’t done jack in Detroit so far. Honestly, I didn’t understand why Jim Caldwell was fired. I know he lost each time the Lions went to the playoffs with him as head coach (2014 +2016), but the man was 36-28 in 4 seasons, which was way more winning than that town had been used to. Add a couple more pieces, they could have been a playoff team under JC. Anyway, back to Matty Pat. Why this guy got the job boggled my mind. The Pats defense wasn’t even that great when Patricia left and we all know that any of the success it had came from Bill Belichick. Also – name me one coach from the Belichick tree who has left and done well as a head coach – I’ll wait. Fuckin’ no one. Things aren’t looking good for Detroit. Also, Patricia pulled a real dick move a couple weeks ago when he told a reporter to sit up straight. I don’t get the dude.
Matt Nagy whooped Matt Patricia’s ass last time they faced off: As I said in the title, this is the Nagy vs Patricia rematch. Last season, the Pats opened up the season against the Kansas City Chiefs. What happened? The Chiefs, with Matt Nagy as their offensive coordinator, beat the shit out of New England 42-27 – and that was with Alex Smith, not Patrick Mahomes. All 42 of those points came from the Chiefs offense against Matt Patricia’s defense. I know Andy Reid was calling the plays at this time and not Swaggy Nagy. But, Nagy was there and his team beat Patricia’s ass. Fingers crossed it happens again.
I want Mitch to have another breakout game: Mitchell Trubisky has had a couple down games the past two weeks. He hasn’t been terrible, but he hasn’t been dominant either. Don’t get it twisted though, I still believe in 10 God. I want him to have another huge game like he did against the Tampa Bay Bucs and what better way to do it than at home against a division rival like Detroit. There’s no rhyme or reason to why this will happen, I just fucking want it to.
Prediction: Bears 27, Lions 10 – The Bears offense is averaging 29.4 points per game this season, but I feel like they’ll be a tad bit below average today. And that’s okay, people. I have a feeling Khalil Mack is going to explode off the line like a madman and I’m calling a touchdown to Allen Robinson in his return and another to Adam Shaheen if he ends up playing. The Bears beat some Detroit ass and go into their primetime game against Minnesota at 6-3. Bear Down, motherfuckers.
Now that our Outside Linebacker and Savior is back, honor his return and every game he plays with our cooler-than-shit shirt! Buy it RIGHTTTT NOW on the Branded Sports store.