Mess Up the GOAT: 7 Pregame Thoughts on Bears vs Patriots

The Bears took a huge dump on themselves last week against the Miami Dolphins.

Besides a few bright spots from the offense, their turnovers along with awful play and missed tackles from the defense and a missed 53-yard field goal from Cody Parkey made many fans and media members question just how good this team really is.

And now the Bears find themselves in an even bigger “prove it” game coming up against everyone’s favorite NFL team-to-hate, the New England Patriots.

Without question, this feels like the biggest football game to be played in Chicago since the NFC North Division-deciding contest between the Bears and Packers in 2013. I’m nervous, I’m excited and I’m ready for this shit.

Here are my thoughts on today’s game.

Clean as a clean slate: The Bears had a game they’d love to forget from last week. Everything that could go wrong went wrong and they clearly lost to a team that was worse than them in the Dolphins – and how the fuck is Brock Osweiler 3-0 against them? Whatever it was, the Bears start this week with a clean slate…or at least they need to think that way. They need to throw that shitty performance behind them and start clean against the Pats. They know they’re better than they were last week and they DO have what it takes to beat the Patriots. Nobody – Tom Brady or Bill Belichick alike – should scare the Bears. They’ve shown they can win, they’re growing as a team and they know they can shock everyone with a big win over the Pats.

The GOAT is rolling through Soldier Field for (likely) the last time: Love him or hate him, Tom Brady is the man. He’s won 5 Super Bowls, 3 NFL MVP awards, 4 Super Bowl MVP awards, is a 13x Pro Bowler, a 3x First Team All-Pro and is married to a stone cold FOX in Giselle Bundchen. Not only is he pretty much perfect in life, he also has been perfect versus the Bears with a 4-0 record and is likely playing his last game at Soldier Field. I see no better way than for the Bears to ruin Tom’s perfect Chicago record and let him know he’s getting old. Yes, I respect him. But today, I hope Khalil Mack puts him on his ass.

How I want Tom Brady to look on Sunday

Speaking of Khalil Mack: I’m SUPER curious how our Outside Linebacker and Savior, Khalil Mack, will look today. As you may have seen, I pushed for the prayer campaign #Pray4Mack and put in OT this week on my prayers for his ankle. Mack clearly was not himself after hurting his ankle last Sunday against the Dolphins, but earned the goddamn respect of fans everywhere for gritting through it. The Bears have been resting The Mack all week in hopes of keeping him preserved to pass rush the shit out of the GOAT. I really wish this game was against the Bills or Jets so Mack could sit and rest, but it’s against the fucking Patriots. Shit. Keep those prayers up…because we need our guy Mack at his best. Perhaps he’ll play with a chip on his shoulder after Bill Belichick talked some hidden smack about him earlier this week…

Mack Prayer featured
Image: Edited Image from Chicago Tribune

Mitchell just needs to keep doing his thing: The biggest silver lining out of last week’s game was Mitchell Trubisky’s performance. Although he played like shit in the first half and missed a few wide open throws, he rebounded in the second half and put his team in a position to win before the defense gave up a HUGE touchdown to Albert Wilson. I gotta say, I was actually more impressed by Mitch in this past game than the Tampa game, solely because he proved to everyone that he could be resilient, adjust and rebound after poor play. The biggest example of this was his tuddie to Anthony Miller after throwing a forced pick on the previous drive – the man put his shit behind him and delivered. Today? He has a chance to light up a Patriots defense that was pretty damn terrible last week against the Chiefs. Even with two interceptions, Patrick Mahomes still had a good game and almost pulled out the W.

Trubisky-Pats Preview
Image: Chicago Bears Twitter

Tackle, damn it: This is simply a call to the defense to tackle somebody this week. They know they fucked up and know they can tackle better than they did last week – I played against Pop Warner teams back when I was a little shit youngster who tackled better than the Bears defense did last week. The Bears missed 14 tackles against the Dolphins after only missing 15 tackles the previous 4 games combined. So, I hope Papa Vic Fangio went back to the drawing board and had the boys do some old school tackling, because it’s going to be needed this week against the crazy playmaking ability if Julian Edelman and the weed-speed of Josh Gordon.

Pats Tackles.jpg
Image: Bears Wire-USA Today

Mess em’ up: The Patriots have regained their mystique the past 3 games after starting off the season 1-2. I’m sure many experts will pick the Pats to win and they’re not unjustified in doing so…which is why the Bears need to get mean and mess these guys up. Who cares if Tom Brady’s the GOAT? Who cares is Josh Gordon can make big plays? Who cares if Bill Belichick is a genius? The NFL is a week-to-week league and the Bears can make it their week by fucking up the Pats. Shove a bit after the whistle. Let Tom know you’re coming on that pass rush. Shove the ball down the Patriots’ defense throat. Tell the Pats that Boston accents are the most ugly sound to ever be uttered by humans. The Bears are young, but can’t be afraid against that New England mystique – and they can show the league they’re for real with a mean win against legends. Also, kind of helps that Gronk is out of the game…

Win it for me: The Bears have many reasons to want to win this game, but I’m gonna add to the list by saying they should win it for me. Why? Because I have two Branded teammates – Nick Dubs and Ali – who are HUGE Pats fans. I don’t want to have to deal with their ridicule and shit talk after a Bears loss to their team. Dubs’ Red Sox are in the World Series and Ali has LeBron being a Lakers fan – just give me something. But, please check out Nick and Ali’s writing – it’s fucking killer and I love working with them.

Nick Dubs and Ali.png
Nick Dubs and Ali

Prediction: Bears 24, Patriots 21 – In case you haven’t seen after 5 games, I don’t pick against the Bears. I may think they’re going 11-5 for the season, but I would never not pick against them – I’m not a damn journalist either. That being said, I really think this game is going to be a dogfight. I think the Bears and Pats are going to come out sharp and throw the kitchen sink at each other, causing a close game and a drag-em out to the finish contest. I think my boys ultimately will win by a field goal, get back on track and let the league know they’re for real. Bear the fuck Down.

Follow us on Twitter @branded_sports and keep track of my written nerves during today’s game @ekurbyun


Featured Image: Chicago Bears Twitter

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