I wanted to be taken to the ER yesterday after that Bears game.
I thought I almost had a heart attack, I was dealing with DEFCON 5 level anxiety and my head almost exploded at everything that happened against the Dolphins.
DEFCON ScaleĀ

Nevertheless…I survived. We all did as Bears fans. We’re still here. We’re sitting at 3-2. And we’re moving on after that horrendous loss in South Beach.
Here are my thoughts about the game against the Fins:
That was a TEAM loss:Ā One of my favorite, easy, go-to lines from coaches and players after a good win is the liberal use of the term “team win.” Well, if the Week 4 win against the Buccaneers was a “team win,” then this game against the Dolphins was sure as shit a team loss. What the hell happened out there? Between the defense looking like a shell of the dominant in-your-fucking-face self it has been to the crucial offensive turnovers to Cody Parkey’s missed field goal, the entire team lost that game. Sure, you can list out the blames and mark some as more important than others, but let’s just simply pin the blame on everyone.
This is the first time the defense looked BAD: In my recovery from yesterday’s loss, I kept coming back to how I didn’t see that performance from the defense coming AT ALL. It seemed they had all the momentum going into yesterday’s game with a beastly performance against the high-powered Bucs and the fact that Brock Osweiler was announced as the starter before the game. I thought we were going to see some straight ass-kicking…damn was I wrong. The pass rush was nonexistent the entire game with 0 sacks and only 4 QB hurries. The linebackers and secondary got absolutely torched by Albert Wilson. And even with with two nice picks from Kyle Fuller, Brock Osweiler threw the ball around like he was frickin’ Peyton Manning. I don’t know what happened, but I pray to the Football Gods that performance by the D was fluke.
Was the officiating crew part of the replacement refs from 2012?: Any of you remember the 2012 NFL referee lockout? If not, it was when the NFL referees went on strike for a labor dispute, which caused the NFL to use replacement officials for 3 weeks of the season. What happened? Some of the WORST calls in NFL history. Not that I’m saying the bad officiating was the difference maker in the Bears loss, but it sure as hell didn’t help. Where do we even start? They missed ALLLLL the holding calls on the Dolphins offensive line, including a metric fuck ton on Khalil Mack and a play that saw Akiem Hicks’ helmet fly off his head (can I get an illegal hands to the face?). The Trey Burton pick-play penalty was a load of shit – was Kiko Alonso really gonna get Tarik Cohen? And everyone’s favorite…the roughing the passer call on Leonard Floyd. Are. You. Kidding. Me? Get these guys off the damn field.
This brutally violent act by Bears LB Leonard Floyd on Dolphins QB Brock Osweiler drew a roughing the passer penalty. Thereās simply no room in the sport for such gruesome violence. Please do not allow small children to watch this video. pic.twitter.com/NPDstdwPNG
— NOTSportsCenter (@NOTSportsCenter) October 14, 2018
I don’t care what you say, Mitchell Trubisky did enough: I seriously don’t get what Mitchell Trubisky has to do to get a little respect around town. Was that forced interception after the penalty on Trey Burton bad? Yes. Did Mitch have a bad a first half? Yes. But guess what? The dude put his team back in the game by leading the offense to 21 points to start the second half and rebounded from that bad pick with a wide open look tuddie to Anthony Miller to put the Bears ahead 28-21. This was before the defense gave up another Albert Wilson breakaway TD to tie the game. I think we’re all forgetting the disappointing Jay Cutler years, the interception-filled nightmares of Rex Grossman and the laundry list of shitty QBs before that. Let’s be happy that we have a quarterback who for now is at least keeping our team in games. Oh, and he’s on pace for 35 TDs, over 4,000 yards and a 105.6 passer rating this year. Do the fucking math.
Anthony. Miller.
Touchdown. #DaBears pic.twitter.com/hTcYQxuvHN
— Cristiano Simonetta (@CMS_74_) October 14, 2018
Get Leonard Floyd a UFC Contract: Side note, if Leonard Floyd can’t make it in football, he should train MMA and go fight in the UFC. Yes, that penalty by him on Danny Amendola was dumb, but he put us all on notice with that strength. Looked like a Daniel Cormier slam out there!
https://twitter.com/barstooltweetss/status/1051523606922969088
Someone tell Cody Parkey to not thank heaven after a missed field goal: I was pretty pissed at Parkey while I was watching the game, but I’m not gonna rag on him anymore. Shit happens and it was a tough kick to make from 53 yards. But to point to the sky after a MISSED field goal? Nah man, don’t do that. I’m skeptical hippo on doing that after a made field goal, let alone one that is missed.
Not a huge fan of thanking the heavens after missing a game winning field goal. pic.twitter.com/4CO9J0BqVT
— Dave Portnoy (@stoolpresidente) October 14, 2018
Win or lose, orange still rules: I’ll say it again, loved the orange alternate uniforms. Even in losing, they still looked damn good.
We’re coming home to my Branded buddy Nick Dubs’ New England Patriots. I’m a little worried right now, but I know the Bears can win…more on that later this week. Bear Down.
Follow us on Twitter @branded_sports and watch me freak out during the game @ekurbyunĀ
Featured Image: Yahoo SportsĀ