Can Michael B. Jordan Play Linebacker?

Things are getting pretty dire for us New England Patriots fans. First, Dunkin Donuts took away our $.87 coffee after ever Patriots win. As a result, it was hard to feel invested in the regular season. After an ugly week 3 loss to the Lions for the first back to back losses since 2012 (and double digit losses!!), it appears that the Patriots players may also be affected by the lack of discounted caffeine.

We’ve grown accustomed to bad September Patriots football, so I’ve been trying to push the sky up and prevent it from falling. But today news broke that the Patriots are putting running back Rex Burkhead and linebacker Ja’Whaun Bently on injured reserve, and that’s just not good. Word out of training camp this offseason was that Rex Burkhead was going to be a star in the Patriots offense this year, but after being force fed Sony Michel on every run play, I wondered who started those rumors in the first place. A month ago I thought the Patriots running back position was the deepest in the NFL. Now we’ve lost Jeremy Hill and Rex Burkhead and I’m regretting my over the top celebration when Brandon Bolden was signed to the Miami Dolphins.

There has been a curse of the Patriots 2018 draft class, and Ja’Whaun Bentley is the latest victim. It was glaringly obvious that the biggest issue in the Patriots loss to the Lions was the linebacker position. It’s grim. And Bentley’s interception was the only sparkle in the turd. I have no idea what happened to him but for the first time in just about a year, I’m concerned. People are criticizing Dont’a Hightower and I’m not going to watch the All-22 footage but I didn’t like what I saw on Sunday.

The Patriots have been bringing in running backs, linebackers and wide receivers, but anyone that remains unsigned in September is probably not the answer to getting the Patriots back to the Super Bowl. I will never give up on this team as long as the roster still has Tom Brady and Bill Belichick is the head coach (although I still need answers about Malcom Butler) but if the Pats lose to Miami this week, houses are going to start burning down all over New England. And this time it won’t be Columbia Gas’ fault.

Today the official trailer for Creed II was released and it got me thinking–can Michael B. Jordan play football?

I mean the star of this trailer is Michael B. Jordan’s abdomen area, and his arms aren’t too shabby either. He has obviously been back to his psychotic training and a quick Google search told me he can bench press 315.  He’s 6′ and would make a perfect Patriot personality wise. Plus…


The game day photos of him walking into the stadium would haunt Cam Newton’s dreams. All I’m saying is we should at least have him in for a workout.

@aliweitz @BarstoolBadGal

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