You got engaged? OMG… Congrats! I am so happy for you!!
Wife: We got the save the date!
Me: When is it?
Me: MAKE THE MADNESS STOP!
I am just going to come out and say it before I even go any further:
Football Season IS NOT wedding season.
It’s a long, lonely wait from the end of the college and NFL seasons until they begin again. A long… 7… Month… Wait.
That is over half the year.. With no football! And, that’s over half the year… To have a great wedding. We aren’t asking for much here, we aren’t saying you can only get married February to March, that’s a 7 month stretch!
I mean, football season is so short. It flies by. I only get to see my Irish play 12 times (13 with a bowl, 14 if they get to the Natty) a year. That’s 12 Saturday’s, that means there are like 50 Saturday’s a year with NO college football…
Now also.. Sunday weddings are becoming a thing. We get 17 weeks of the NFL (not including playoffs.) Only 16 games for us to watch our teams are guaranteed a year. Please don’t take one away from us.
I hate that saying “it’s just football” NO. It’s not “just football” it’s.. FOOTBALL. It’s a lifestyle. It’s a part of our fall/winter weekends.
It’s actually guaranteed to us as part of the American Dream. It says… Life, Liberty, The Pursuit of Happiness and… FOOTBALL. It is more American than Apple Pie, it’s more American than Fast Food.
Come to think of it… Football Season Weddings should actually be illegal. They should be a terrorist act, a form of taking your American rights away.
Here’s another little wrinkle… Fall is also… MLB Playoffs. NOW you have created a real mess. Now you are taking away FOOTBALL… AND America’s Past Time… Shame on you.
My wife and I got married in what I like to call the sweet spot! August 20th, I suggest this to everyone. We had a beautiful, awesome Saturday wedding in Philly. We were able to go on a long Honeymoon to Bora Bora, And…
We were home in time for the start of football. BOOM. Sweet spot!
Yes, the Summer can be hot but so can September. Green is a much better backdrop for pictures than orange and brown. You know what else… Winter Weddings are beautiful too!
Yes, you may get beautiful weather in the fall. Yes, you may get beautiful pictures in the fall. But you know what else you will get…
Every. Single. Couple. At the wedding fighting. (Including the Bride and Groom.) The guys will be running to the bar “is there a tv?? Turn on the game!! Do you have Redzone?” Or posted up at their tables watching on their phones.
While the ladies will be on the dance floor, one at a time going to find their man to have the “what hell are you doing? Are you just gonna watch football all night?” talk. No one needs that.
Trust me, last year I sat at a table and watched (almost) the entire Yankee playoff game with a group of guys at our table. AND THEY LOST. Not ideal.
I may be so angry you are taking a football Saturday or Sunday away… Your gift might happen to be a little light… I’m just sayin.
So please, if you are planning a wedding… Think of all of us football fans. (Which is everyone, duh.) Do you really want to take part of our American Dream away from us? I didn’t think so.
Remember, there are SEVEN months of no football. Perfect. (You will probably even save $) See another win for everyone.
Happy planning… Remember guys whatever she wants, just say yes….
…Except for a (say it all together)
FOOTBALL SEASON WEDDING!
I would never make my dudes miss football…
But if you do…
-Kevin “That Guy”