Look, I get it. Always warm and sunny, rains like once every three years. Bikinis and boobies everywhere. And dogs, LITERALLY everywhere. Yeah, the west coast is legit. However, is the West Coast really the “Best Coast?”
I just got back from a little tour of SoCal and it was one of the best trips ever. Was it awesome? Fuck yeah. Would I move there? Fuck no.
It’s dope out there, but purely for a vacation. Similar to the vacation that Manny Machado will be taking in LA for the next few months before he will more-than-likely come back to the east coast. *cough cough* PHILLY. While we’re on the topic of athletes choosing LA over Philly – I don’t want to get too deep into it, but this whole LeBron thing really grinds my gears. The Lakers stink, and the Sixers are actually good. Like, we’re waaayyy closer to a ‘chip than the Lakers are. Little Lonzo just got surgery on his knee, so who knows if that will nag him moving forward. I’m just still salty over ‘Bron going there instead of here. Thanks for letting me vent.
Southern California is real sick though. Ridiculous scenery and landscape, unreal sunsets, dope beaches, and tons of fun shit to do. There’s even a nude beach where I got naked and let it all fly free. Now that, my friends, is a feeling I can’t describe. I just can’t live in a place that is out-of-touch from reality. The population of SoCal can be broken down into two groups: A) people that are so insanely rich, they don’t even know how to go to the store for a dozen eggs, and B) people who moved there strictly for the boobies, puppies, sunshine, and surfing – and hope to become like the people in group A one day but are too lazy to actually do anything to get there. I saw more homeless people in one square mile in Santa Monica than I think we have in the entire city of Philadelphia.
Even Biggie knew that it was better to visit the West Coast and live on the East Coast. However, his last visit to LA didn’t really pan out too well. Yikes.
All I’m saying is that it is so much better to live on the East Coast and go visit the West Coast. I mean, if you live in paradise, you wouldn’t really have a reason to go on vacation anywhere. And going on vacation is the shit. I’m a big vacation guy. At least when you live on the East Coast, you have a reason to go visit the warm and sunny places that our wonderful Mother Earth has to offer.
WHY COULDN’T LEBRON AND MANNY COME TO PHILLY??!! WHY DOES PAUL GEORGE WANT TO GO TO LA SO BAD??? WHY IS IT PRETTY MUCH INEVITABLE THAT KAWHI WILL GO TO LA AFTER HE LEAVES THE STEAMING SHIT PILE OF TORONTO???!!!! LA ISN’T THAT DOPE!!! IT SMELLS LIKE PEE PEE AND THEIR SPORTS TEAMS ARE JUST OKAY.
Thanks for tuning in. East coast ’til I die, bitch.